Pikachu is HOME!!

Alhamdulillah...finally got the naughty baby home. Was trying to get him right until I had to go to Singapore for Wirza's wedding. Of course at that time I had no idea we'd be losing Pikachu, so I stayed 3 days for a mini holiday. On Monday and Tuesday morning he didn't show up when I called and honestly, I was already really late for work. So no idea who actually ate the food I left.

Last night, I saw him lounging ON a car near the dumpster. When I approached (again, leaving my groceries and handbag at random locations while chasing after the cat), he was hungry enough to come close. I had no food on me, so I just grabbed him. Thank God he didn't fight me! He did struggle a bit when I opened the boot so I shut him in the car while i assembled the cage. Thank God I kept it in the boot just in case!!

After a bit of coaxing, he calmed down enough for me to stuff him in the cage and bring him upstairs.

At first he was very blur, didn't know where he was. Didn't want to eat his food. Leo was hostile and he was hostile to Michelle. Seriously? Do you have something against female cats?? 

When K Ayu came back, she gave him 'his' blankie, he calmed down and started eating. Soon he was feeling much more comfortable; enjoyed the cuddling and loving he got...

When a cat is stretched out like THIS, it's obvious that he knows he's in a safe place and can really relax... Last night he was still a little restless, going in and out of the room. Aku yang tak lena tidur. This morning K Ayu gave him a much needed bath. He was so dirty he left paw prints on my white T-shirt. Sigh... 

At least he's home now, and we can plan to pindah in peace. I won't be going up and down chasing after a cat. I'm sure the Permai people already branded me as mereng by now :P Sabar ajelah... Will pamper him a little so that he'll regain some weight. He's so scrawny, with some luka on his neck. I'll bet he'll appreciate not having to scrounge the garbage bin and fight for food with Abu or the dogs anymore. I can rest assured that he's not getting wet or hiding in some longkang if it rains heavily as it does often now... 

Syukur sangat2 that he's home. Nakal macam mana pun, I really tak sampai hati tengok dia merempat the past few weeks. And God knows how he survived the 6 weeks before we found him. Welcome home, sayang.... Saranghae....

The Final Push

Dah lebih sebulan dah duit dapat, tak setel2 lagi dengan bank... frust betul!! Baru ni I tak sabar call the vendor's lawyer, baru dapat maklumat terkini. Abang nak senang suruh tunggu aje. sampai bila nak tunggu? Dah 9 bulan dah. kalau mengandung dah beranak pun!

Semalam dah jenguk rumah and ambik measurements, rasa ok la sikit. I have a clearer picture about the house. terjawab la semua soalan2 yg dok terbayang dalam kepala, boleh la nak plan sikit. Banyak benda nak plan. Nak mintak quotations pun nak kena buat measurements dulu.

Then nak keluar duit KWSP pun makan masa... Banyak yang nak dibayarnya nanti. Perabut seribu sana, seribu sini, takut tak cukup jer RM20,000. My bathroom pun tak sure lagi nak buat macam mana. nasib baik tile K Ayu elok lagi, x payah tukar. Maybe nak tukar cistern macam kat permai kot, not sure. Taps boleh cari yang murah2 kat ACE Hardware pun boleh tahan jugak selection dia. Cat lagi...

Ni dah November, I told En Rosdi I'll move by end of the year. Kalau boleh I nak masuk before Christmas la. But there'll be lots of prep to do beforehand, so I need the time. New year nanti sure busy. PMM & PSC will be in December, so will not be very free.

Did I mention that we lost Pikachu sometime in September? Dah la masa tu I busy gila dengan the River Carnival... Cari punya cari, rupanya cari in the wrong places. After 6 weeks, tetiba dia muncul kat dumpster depan. Ya Rabbi.... Pulak tu dah merajuk takmo balik. so far dah lebih seminggu I dok pujuk dia hari2 bawakkan makanan. bila dia jual mahal, aku pun buat dono. pagi tadi alhamdulillah I boleh usap dia sikit. While I pergi ambik cage, dia dah main cak-cak i.e. lari2 again. Jeez! dah la time orang nak pergi kerja!!

Will have to keep feeding and pujuking him sampai dia mau bagi I bawak dia balik. Si Oleo pun dah meragam takmo makan. Either dia rindu Pikachu or dia takde gigi!! Sabar ajelah aku dok melayan kerenah 'anak-anak' aku ni. But without Pikachu, Michelle and Trina manja sikit, can lepak on my bed without being bullied off. Dilema kan... Hope I can bring him home soon. Nowadays hari2 hujan, tak sampai hati mengingat si budak nakal tu duduk kat bawah kesejukan, berlindung entah kat mana, makan sampah... Sedih memikirkannya.

Tapi aku teringat pulak yang a few days before he disappeared, aku bedal dia kaw-kaw pasal cari gaduh dengan Michelle... Perangai dia teruk sangat time tu, dia attack Michelle sungguh2. Kalau Leo cuma intimidate aje. Pulak kalau ada 2 ekor jantan kuning ni, menjadi2 pulak perangai depa. Patut sangat la dia takut tengok aku!

Tapi tu la, kan... 'mak' kucing pun sayang 'anak'.... Marah2 pun, tak sanggup tengok menatang yang dia bela tu kurus kering merempat kat parking lot. He'd better follow me home before we move house though... Dah babai karang lagi susah.

Dreams: Part IV

Sometimes I feel like I'm going mad... So much work to do and somehow can never get anything done :( Nak cari 2nd officer pun, so susah...

Besok just can't decide about going down to JB. Duit CIMB tak masuk2, the bodoh officers made me sign the PPI form like 3 times. The first 2 dah hilang, hope 3rd time's the charm. The I transferred Rm1000 from Maybank pun tak masuk lagi my CIMB account. Come on la, it's been more than a day! The money is out of MBB, but it's not in CIMB. That means that it's lost in transit. Geez! Tukar orang punya account number, tak inform. Kata it's the same, then how come my transfer tak masuk? Mesti sangkut somewhere, kan?

If I go down, nak jugak shopping kat JPO. Kalau tak no point la turun jauh2. Then dok fikir nak tidur mana. K Intan dah offer dah, but then macam tak best la pulak pasal tau perangai dia kan? Tadi kemain lagi dia memujuk, takde beza la, hapa lah. Yang kau dah kapur harta Mak Ngah, Pak Ngah, Yaie & Nyai aku, tak mengaku. Apa dia ingat aku tak tau yang dia tu penipu?? Somehow I got Nyai's kerabu, but I think there was something else I was supposed to get, tak dapat. Hate it. But then, I grew up with her kids, so how? Sedara angkat pun, close jugak. Like, tak best lak kalau tak pergi Lisa's wedding. Even though she's anak angkat, takkan nak ignore kot. Even though I ignored her sisters' weddings.. heh!

One of Abah's mangoes turned out tawar and the rest spoiled. I got rid of them. Geez, dad. Can't you give something that's NOT rotten to your kids? You want good things out of us, right? Sometimes he drives me up the wall! Can you dump your rotten wife, please?

Next, back to dreams....

Part IV - Dining hall 

Well, I want to play down this area. Just a nice expandable table and simple chairs, maybe even stools for eating. Keep the table small for normal days, expand it when company comes. Maybe the chairs/stools can be stacked aside when not in use.

What I'd really like is a nice sideboard where we can keep the good crockery. Would like to take some of Mom's nice pyrex sets for our use. I'd like to have space to keep my collection of coffees and teas so we can make interesting drinks for our guests. Perhaps an electric kettle won't be amiss if it's for gatherings. I could keep my ice-cream machine there too. Leave the savoury stuff in the kitchen :)

Would be good to keep the cutleries near the dining table, so good drawers are a must to keep the eating and serving utensils. Ooh... I can't wait to have a nice dining area again!! Away from the TV, s'il vous plait...

Dreams: Part II & III

Just called KWSP again today - meeting will be on 29th August. Oh God!! That is SO far away!

Part II: Balcony 

Well, it's a tiny one at best, but should be able to hold a few plants and herbs. Planning to get  foldable drying rack for drying towels/clothes. The type that folds against the wall when not in use.

Depending on wind flow, it MIGHT hold a 2nd kitty litter. But not if it's an air intake point. Would like to tile it up with leftover terra cotta tiles from Abang.

Part III: Drying area 

It will hold the washing machine, obviously. Should tile it up and put on an awning to keep the rain out. Will need wiring since there are no plug points in that area. I should be able to store the kitty litter and ladder there. May switch the hinge so the door opens inside to allow more space outside.

Dreams: Part I

Well, since the house is still stuck in the process, I might as well record what I WISH I could do to it once it's ours....

Part I: My bathroom. 

The apartment has 2 bathrooms, so we'll have one each.

I'm thinking to put a heater in K Ayu's bath, because it's the one outside, hence will be for public use in case any guests come. I won't need it all the time, but a warm shower will be a nice option when the weather turns cool and I need to shower in the middle of the night. Local wisdom says you can get pneumonia if you often bathe at night. I'm assuming it applies to COLD showers or baths.

For MY bath, I'm looking around for a small, movable bathtub. I'm pleased to see they actually exist! A hot bath is a rare comfort appreciated when you're tired and sore, certainly not something I want to indulge in every day. I won't even bother with a hot water tap for it. A big pot and stove would suffice for my needs.

I'm not too sure of the bathroom dimensions, but I won't want a bathtub permanently cluttering the tiny space. Climbing in and out would be a hassle and I might need a curtain if it's too close to the commode.  I think I'd like a little floor space to do hand washing when necessary too.

It would be great if someone could build me a storage rack for the tub near the ceiling. It bothers me that the water tank is so low. I'd like to see if it can be replaced with a smaller one so it won't take up so much space. There's only so much water one person needs to use...

I won't be able to afford it right away, because I'd need some electrical wiring, painting and floor work done just before we move in. Then I'll need to buy furniture in stages, since we don't really have good furniture. I have the inherited stuff from the old house, but at some point, a girl wants something up to date, NOT a relic from the seventies! But I digress...

Eventually, I would like to replace the plain blue tiles with something nicer. Something in earth tones, warm yellows and pinks, maybe a touch of Javanese incorporated.... Then having movable items like tubs would make sense right? Less wastage. If I can afford it, maybe I'd change the commode to something more modern. Low flow and dual mode would be nice. Change the taps and shower heads. And get a nice sink+cabinet set from IKEA to store my toiletries. I could get a large mirror for the sink, and consider a rack or something for intermediate storage. Alternatively, I could leave the nook (I believe there is one) open for either kitty litter or baldi and mop. Plus, I may change the door to a sliding one, in frosted glass. Wouldn't that be awesome? The normal one would take up a lot of swinging space, so sliders would be good.

Of course all these would take up money, so I have no idea when it can be done. But it's nice to have dreams, otherwise you can't begin to plan :D. More dreams later, folks. Cheers!!

Having some cheese with the whine...

2 months later, and we STILL haven't settled the house purchase....

We finally signed the S&P + docs on 24th June. Then I had to go to Riau & Manila for work. By the time I came back and went to submit the withdrawal request to KWSP, they had changed the rules!! It took effect on July 1st with no warning whatsoever.

Previously we were allowed to withdraw our savings in order to pay for ongoing house purchases. Suddenly, we were expected to pay for it in full, then withdraw. Yeah, like where the *&&^%$%& am I supposed to get RM100k from? Pinjam kat Ah Long???? If we had so much cash lying around, then tak payah la nak keluarkan duit EPF kan? Bloody **^&*()&&^ idiots. Did *SOMEONE* finish off all our savings already?? It's ridiculous!! And how can you make a change with such a huge financial impact with  immediate effect? There was no public announcement or anything. Just like that, we were stuck. Abang said he borrowed from his credit card to pay the extra 10% and now he must be suffering huge interest bills. And they decided to wait until after Raya to discuss this. God knows if it's after one, two or three weeks... We submitted in mid- July!!

This house buying saga is seriously pulling me down. As previously said, I'm sick and tired of living in Permai. Recently I tried to join them for solat terawih and left just after Isya'. There were perhaps 3 lines for the girls, and most of it was taken up by kids who were more interested in giggling with their friends than praying. Dah nak start pun sibuk tukar2 tempat lagi. Tak reti beratur rapat2, habis putus saf. Satu row kat depan dok gelak2. Maybe I'm spoilt, but I've grown to expect certain behaviours during prayers. Surau berlagak pasang loudspeaker kuat2, padahal yang betul2 solat kat surau tu entah berapa kerat aja.

Nak pergi Damansara, takut balik takde parking... Alasan? Maybe, but the other day I oredy kena saman RM100 for parking tepi jalan. I didn't have much choice since parking was super full that night, but in the morning kena jugak. :( Tak bayar, takleh renew road tax...

I'm tired of not having a proper space to work in, and the drawers are getting worse each day. My 'study table' has been taken over by 2 potted plants and the cats. The lamp is far away and the study lamp needs extra extensions to switch on. The other available table is in front of the TV, which is not good for concentration, and also doubles as the dining table. Yes, alasan again, but try hunching over a small table for long periods trying to finish work and end up with a backache. It sucks!

There are so many ideas in my head that I can't really action on until I actually get the house. Imagine having so many dreams, and then get held back by the most ridiculous obstacles ever. Dah la tak boleh nak ambik loan because technically my commitments are too high, nak bayar cash pun banyak sangat problem. I'm really feeling very unhappy right now. I was so looking forward to solat terawih at the Jasmine surau. Now hapah pun tarak. There's a bunch of things that need to be done before we can move in and at this rate, we probably won't be able to until December. Nasib baik I trusted my instincts and held back on informing my landlord of our intention to move. I feel a little bad for them because we have been paying minimal rent there for almost 4 years already...

I really hope that the KWSP people will see sense and allow us to withdraw our hard earned money to pay for the apartment.... I was so looking forward to celebrating Raya in our new place, and now all I have is frustration after frustration... Perhaps a visit to the friendly neighbourhood bomoh is required to cast off this pall of bad luck :P As Yi Han might say, "Ti|dak lu|cu.." heh.

Guilt

Right now I feel like a mother who had abandoned her handicapped child :( I keep worrying about Nemo, whether she was going back to Mak Lang's house to eat or roaming around, scared and hungry...

But I haven't been able to go find her, being stuck in the office night after night because for some reason, I only sleep at 3 or 4 a.m. and then go around in a fog until noon when the old tinker finally kicks in. So I start on my mountain of mess late and end up late too. It doesn't help that there are so many things going on at about the same time and I'm scrambling to finish them all on a lame ass brain....

I managed to patch something together for RCP by Monday night but the PR for Raj has been delayed for too long. Just managed to throw him the Media Advisory today after holing up in the cave after lunch. Still owe him the Press Release which he has been asking for for ages. I HATE being this stupid person who can't get her work done on time. I wish there was some magic elixir which would help me wake up and deliver gorgeous work on time, every time.

A junior who just started work last year managed to get a new job which pays as much as my salary just one year later. It took me 17 years to get this far. How depressing is that?? All this while, I've just crawled along year after year scared to death of losing my current job because for some reason, I can't seem to be any good at anything at all. It's bloody depressing to be the stupid one who can't do well after years and years of trying.

I'm not even sure there would be any good to gain from going back to find Nemo because she could be miles away by now. But then, she did stay close when she roamed last year, so hopefully she would still be nearby and I can set things right...

It's doesn't feel right that she has to suffer because we, the dominant ones, could not tolerate her presence in our territory any longer... I DO love that silly old dodo, for what it's worth and I really don't want her to suffer. She probably suffers emotionally too, because probably the only person to actually care for and coddle her had abandoned her in lands unknown. Such betrayal would hurt for sure, right??

Maybe I feel too much on behalf of my animals, maybe I would have been better off as a vet... God knows.. I hope HE takes care of her, because right now, I can't. 

Follow-up procedures...

I think I need to balik kampung again to look for Nemo... Managed to call Abg Ajis (after a few tries) and he said she fled the cage by morning, because he DIDN'T stop by that night like Mak Lang said he would.

Damn. I knew it would happen. At least it's at the kampung with less traffic and no 10 floor drop. But still, I need to fix the problem now that the rehoming has gotten into a snag, as usual. This is one difficult cat, seriously.

And I did handle the transfer badly. I should have sent Nemo to Abg Ajis' house and introduced her to her new family instead of leaving her at Mak Lang's house. After I left, I realised that riding on a bike would freak Nemo out big time. For all her claws, she's just a big dodo...Sheez. Why do I ever listen to other people, really? Why? Why? Why?

I guess life would be perfect if she could get along with the other 4 terrors and used the toilet bin like everyone else, but she's not. And this was the best solution I could come up with. The least I could do is to go over and help her transition to her new life...

In the meantime, the other 4 dodos are sublimely happy to regain access to my room. They really seem to love sitting on my desk to enjoy the fresh air and sunshine. Pikachu slept on my bed last night and rejoiced in destroying my odd and ends. Sigh, if I could sort out the Nemo problem, it would be one less worry on my mind.

On the housing front, had a row with Abang last night. Complained to Abah and Shamila, was going to call Busu today but thankfully Abang saw the light and finally gave me the cheque late last night. Was sufficiently pissed off to ignore his call, had to force myself to check his message. When I saw it, I aborted a Scrab game I was in the middle of and drove over in K Ayu's car since mine was hopelessly blocked by then. Barely spoke a word to him since I was so annoyed. HOPEFULLY, the rest will be smooth going and I will have a new home by my fortieth birthday. Insya-Allah... There will be a lot of work to get there, but at least I won't be stuck at first base!

Relief..

Sent Nemo balik kampung semalam and finally got my room back, sans kitty litter. Have rearranged room to normal, changed sheets and put away clothes. When the offending tray was there, I barely wanted to be in the room, and many papers and stuff weren't put away properly. Nak semayang pun macam tak konfiden bilik bersih :(

On the other hand, felt very guilty about sending her away. It's not that I don't want to care for her. In a way, I'm worried that i'm the only one with the patience to deal with her silly, clingy ways. It didn't reassure me much to see K Maria's legion of starving babies being ignored while she visited with us. Guess I'm too much of a city girl to get along with the kampong's laissez faire ways. Tak nak mandulkan the kitties and just feed 12 cats the same amount of food you spare for 3. I may be making assumptions here, but I'm not too encouraged by what I saw. I hope Abg Ajis and family will be more responsible with Nemo. At least she can roam and have more people layaning her there. She's already fixed, so at least there won't be a problem of unwanted babies. I'll have to send over food and maybe money if I want to make sure she's well fed.

But then, my idiots here are just wasting a lot of food that they refuse to eat if it doesn't suit their tastebuds. Spoilt brats, huh? I didn't have much choice since I got sick breathing in polluted air for 2 months, and she needed space to roam and exercise. She was just eating and sleeping in my room, and it was difficult to take care of everyday stuff with a kitty litter in the way. It may be just under the table, but the smell was everywhere! Even when it was cleared, there was still a leetle stink to remind you that it's there.

I had to face the fact that Nemo was never going to be integrated with the rest of the brats. We should be moving this year, and puasa is coming, I just couldn't deal with the disruption anymore. So I sent her away and hope for a better life for the both of us. I hope I did the right thing. Things are pretty good over here, hope it's as good for her there too. 

Anxiety

Am glad I have the day off... Rushed in the morning to take Pikachu for the snip. Arrived a little late, but it was done in less than half an hour. A little freaked to see him so quiet after the procedure, but he was awake by the time we arrived in DU. Spent 20 minutes cleaning up after Abang's cats, then headed home.

Finally got one load in the dryer and one in the machine, with a few odd pieces soaking in the baldi. Am not feeling too good, thanks to the silly game that kept me awake all night Saturday. Will still be catching up with work though. Made a pot of nice Sri Lankan tea to accompany me; hope i'll have time for a nap later on. Will just have to deal with a few tasks so I won't be so bogged down tomorrow.

Won't have to cook since there's plenty of food left over from yesterday. Will just need to make a fresh batch of kuah pecal. Beats the Balinese version anytime :) Went over for a treat last week and left so unfulfilled because the 'tipat cantuk' tasted odd to my Javanese tastebuds.

Am feeling a bit annoyed with Abang because he's not home yet and he didn't tranfer the money to me, so I can't sign the documents and settle the deposit. It's been 4 months already, so both sides are getting unhappy. I really want to move  before puasa starts, I want to solat terawih at our new surau... It will need a couple of weeks to get money out of EPF and K Ayu's problem needs to be dealt with ASAP.

Right now, my laundry bag is on it's last legs and I hate being cooped up with Nemo in the room. Unlike Leo, Michelle and Trina, Nemo and Pikachu are a little invasive on sleepers - they like to kacau you at 6 in the morning. Not good when you go to bed at one! Due to the location of the litter box, I moved my clothes rack and little desk so could at least deal with my papers and catch up with my reading. But the arrangement is odd, and I find myself wishing for more room to maneuver. At least with Pikachu in the cage, I can leave my room door open for some fresh air. The wardrobe drawers are driving me nuts as well, the slides keep getting screwed and it's so difficult to open and shut. My fault, actually, for overloading them, but hey, where else do I put my clothes then??

Am feeling so tired of living in this crampy old apartment with annoying parking arrangements. Thank goodness the children are not screaming anymore. But the surau can be annoying depending on the presiding imam and bilal. I like one guy who actually calls you to prayer, not the other one who practically demands attention. It gets tiresome to be bombarded with sounds that is so much louder than necessary too often. The unit is quite nice, bright and airy, but I really need to move on. It's been 3.5 years already...

I know the new place will be further from the office, and it will need money to paint and repair, not to mention buying the crucial bits of furniture. But it would mean a home we can call our own. It would have more space than we have now, and I can actually install a water heater and aircon to make it more comfortable and homey.

I'm not supposed to whine, but I'm really a little weary from all this wishing and hoping and waiting. I hate the fact that I have to rely on someone else for money, and that person is holding us back more than is necessary.. I hope everything will move forward smoothly once we get the S&P and deposit done. Please la, I want to live in my own home...

Seeking comfort

Am sitting in A&W, wallopinig a gazillion calories in the form of my favourite waffles and a huge double scoop tankard of root beer. Needless to say, this is not a common occurrence. I normally shun the sweet drink, but today, the float is going down pretty smooth...

And why am I risking life and limb ingesting so much bad food? Because I was feeling a little bummed and sought a little comfort from food... Why again?? Sigh...

Was supposed to have Korean with Sali, and I could claim my money too.

Korean lunch was postponed and I dragged myself to a doctor's appt, just to find that the place was closed. What the..???? Check my appt card and discovered that the kindly old auntie had booked me for YESTERDAY afternoon. Urgh... Why??? I just did my labs at 11 a.m. and there was no way the results could have been ready by 2. This is so frustrating.... Added to a list of existing frustrations.

Found that I could not get a housing loan due to several technical issues. But we do have enough money combined in EPF to pay for it cash. BUT, we'll need to pay 20% deposit, so we're scambling to get THAT sorted out. In the meantime...

Abah borrowed my car last week, because his was in the workshop. Then I borrowed Busu's spare Iswara. Glad I did, because I only got my car back yesterday. That car is fine, but I still had to do a minor repair coz something broke off. Now, instead of going home to rest, I'll have to go send Busu's car home.

As for MY jalopy, it reeked of Abah's awful daun pandan smell and there's a strange twanging sound coming from God knows where. Bloody annoying.

Then, the silly tap which has been dripping all this while got a whole lot worse, and the whole top came off. But I can't change the thing because the last plumber cemented the old pipe to the wall, and I don't have the tools to open it up. So now, I need to arrange for the plumber to come in between everything else.

Plus, Dr Kali liked my video so much, he asked me to do another one for Penang... It's still half done, as is a million other things on my plate.

K Ayu still hasn't paid me anything, so I could just save some money when Abah practically demanded I give him as much as possible to pay for his car repairs. As if!! Lucky Abang coughed up the dough, it's just too much to dig out the pittance I managed to put away these few months, ok... Standard Two kids have more saved than me.

I wanted to talk to Inas last week, but I fell asleep and she ended up alone in the restaurant for a full hour. She's understandably pissed with me, but I just don't have the energy to grovel for forgiveness. So yr mom is sick? Well mine was too. Deal with it.

Graham can't be bothered to write lately, so it's even more depressing being single. At least when he was around I could whine to him.

My addiction to games and Korean drama is not helping. Plus weekend work, which I'm forced to do tomorrow. urgh. Hate this nonsense.

C'est la Vie...

Perhaps, it is more normal in life to actually have problems... and possibly, it's important to know what exactly those problems are.

For example, the last few weeks, I'm been in some kind of limbo, not knowing whether I have a problem or not. I go to work, struggle with a million things, then go home, eat whatever crap I threw together, then watch TV or play games until I pass out and wake up the next morning to work again. But at the back of my mind, I was agonising over my housing loan, whether it will be rejected or accepted, knowing that if it falls through, I would be back at square one, looking at houses I don't really want to stay in.

It seems unfair that I have paid all my bills on time, most of the time, but some screw up with my car payments made me ineligible for even a small housing loan. And little did I realise, putting my name in the other house's mortgage could set me back so much in the loan calculations. So even though my actual commitments total less than 40% of my income, the bank calculation comes to a whole lot more.

I have been paying rent, electricity, internet, groceries, cleaners and even giving cash to my sis without getting back my share for months already. I'm thankful I still manage to squirrel away some savings, even though it's less than what I wanted to put away. And I am struggling to pay off my credit card with so many things on my wish list the few months past. Thank God I quit the gym. Couldn't even afford to pay for yoga this month. Right now my plans to hang out in the UK seems a very distant dream :(

Sis has not really looked for a proper job she said she wanted when she quit her previous company, and this temp job only just covers  her car installment, leaving a few hundred for expenses and apparently nothing for me. Her outstanding debt is huge and growing bigger each month. I wanted to help with some, but even the interest is crazy. We wanted to take her to AKPK but she's not exactly cooperating.

Right now, I just wish the other application will come through, so that I can move to my own place. Tak apalah if I can't afford proper fittings and furniture. I'll gladly camp with tikar mengkuang and hand me downs as long as the house is mine. I've spent enough paying rent for other people's property, it's time to get my own. I hope we manage to sort something out... I really need to move on. 

Lalala...

Dragged my sorry ass to the office because I absolutely CANNOT work at home. I always end up playing some stupid game or watching something online. I have a few things that need immediate attention and I know I'll feel much better tomorrow if I didn't have anything overdue.

Now, as usual dok terfikir benda bukan2 - i.e. food and Chatime instead of focusing on work. Maybe I'll go over to the other side and make myself a mug of Neslo. Coffee seems to help me focus.

Spring Cleaning Fever

Whoo boy! Just spent a large part of my afternoon going through my Inbox and putting emails into their respective folders. Good thing, coz I found forgotten emails which might have gone undetected at the bottom of the long list. It was only 120 emails or so because I NORMALLY file away emails on a regular basis.

Then somehow got sucked into migrating all my odd notes from OneNote to Evernote. I know some people prefer OneNote to the other, but I suppose it all boils down to how you need the software to work. I tried using ON a few years back and somehow it never became a part of my life - too slow to load and notes are just all over the place!! I ended up with 5 notebooks with a gazillion subfolders holding just one or two sentences. Not very efficient, I think. It's not easy to tag and sync, and I didn't get around to syncing them on my multiple computers. Yes, the subfolders and stuff are a great idea, but it just didn't work for me. I guess it could work better if I had organised it differently, but for my filing needs, it didn't fit the bill.

I realised that I just needed to quickly clip the info I want to keep- and I LOVE the Evernote clipper for this purpose. No need to manually cut and paste. The clipper quickly cuts and I can tag them on the spot before moving on to the next item. It's easy to delete junk information and keep the system clean - something very important to me. And I can easily go through my notebooks and find the info that I need - Their tags work perfectly for this. Plus, I can see a picture of my note beside the title, so I can quickly scan for what I want. It works equally well for business (project notes, references) and pleasure (recipes, etc).

Those who like ON actually MAKE notes and run their projects using the software. I, on the other hand, just need to have the info at hand. I do my project planning on scraps of recycled paper and keep everything together in clear folders.

Unfortunately, I still have a mountain of reorganising to do.... My Documents folder need a cleaning up and after that I'd have to back them up both on the project hard drive and server. On top of THAT, the hard drive and server needs a cleanup too!!! ARRRGGGHHH..

PLUS, there are two piles of hardcopy that I moved from the Projects room to my current space in the OPP zone. Urgh... I might need to come in tomorrow to sort out the mess before the new week comes in, there'll be a ton of work to do with the event on Saturday and other projects to plan and execute. In addition to dealing with 3 websites and a few FB pages... Sigh. Will need to teach project teams to layan their own FB so that I don't go crazy.... Wish me luck, peeps! :D 

Bummed :(

It seems my grand plans for the apartment I want has met with a (hopefully) temporary setback... Groan!! Went to check my CCRISS in the pouring rain on Friday, and unfortunately found that my car payments have been lagging the whole of last year. Damn! that can't be good for the loan application...

NOW I wish banks sent out notifications for car loans. Why don't they, I wonder. My due date is the 20th and I usually pay after the 25th, thinking that I'm paying for the following month's installment. Guess I must have missed a payment somewhere and never made up for it. :( The last time I called the bank to find out, everything was A-OK. I even pay a little extra just in case there were any delays, and now it seems all my efforts were not enough.

Last year was a bit insane, work wise, and I was so stressed, hutang puasa pun aku tak bayar! Now baru terhegeh2 nak setel balik, hutang tahun lepas lagi nak buat... K Ayu quit her long-time job and it took her a long while to find even a temporary one, so I took on all the house bills and rent and groceries etc. Thought I can reduce stress once the new house is under way, guess I was wrong, huh?

I was so excited about moving to a new apartment, I even had everything planned out... Now it may never happen ;( Waaahhhh!!! Nak pindah!!! Sob sob!!

Guess the only consolation is that everything happens for a reason, and it may be for the best that this wish of mine was foiled. I still hope that we can work around the problem. Otherwise it will be yet another round of house hunting which I don't have the time for. Urgh. Hope the year gets better, this isn't very nice...

Reliving Rivalries

I really need to rehome Toby... It's nice that a few people have expressed interest, but so far I haven't got a concrete commitment yet. Will need to advertise on KTAJ and Online Adoption House + Ellen Whyte.

Right now, the house is a virtual combat zone. I need to make sure Pikachu doesn't get near Toby, or else furs will fly!! Last night Toby got bored of being cooped in the room, so he ventured out. I caught Pikachu and put him inside to avoid a battle. This morning, he slipped out to eat and of course saw Toby. I barely managed to save Toby from the little terror! Then of course I got the brunt of his displeasure. Habis tangan aku kena kokak. Sigh... Dah la aku ni diabetic, kucing oi! Habis tangan kaki semua calar balar kalau Pikachu tengah mengamuk. The angel totally goes into Hellboy mode!

The other day I accidentally burnt the back of my wrist terkena iron panas. The skin sloughed off, so I had to protect the raw flesh with some protective film. This morning, he either bit or clawed the burn site and pierced right through the protective bandage. ADOOIII!!! Sakit siyot... The bandage is not cheap, but it's supposed to stay on for a few days without needing to be changed. Right now, I've changed the bandage a few times already due to all this nonsense. Sabar ajelah...

Am a bit worried about Toby, he seems quite lethargic compared to the other cats I've had so far. Maybe he tak cukup makan masa merayau kat parking lot dulu. But he can be picky about food, totally ignoring stuff he doesn't like. At least he likes the cheap food and eats loads of it. Another cost for me on top of neutering him next week...

Thank goodness Toby can hold his own in a fight and doesn't go hiding in the bloody storeroom like Nemo did! What a fiasco that was, with her falling 10 floors down and all. With Toby, I just need to make sure any wounds don't get infected and start another abscess.

Hope someone takes him in soon...The kitty litter is taking up my workspace and the idiots are all bunched up in the living room. Will have to hurry up and buy a proper home. I'm so tired of the noise in Permai.

Secrets

I've got a deep dark secret - I don't WANT to be a professional, not that I'm earning much money anyway... But I actually want to be a homemaker. With kids. Working part time for pocket money... But at this point in time, don't think it's gonna happen la kan... Shoot. I'm so crummy at work :(

Feeling Trippy..

Aaarrrrgghhh!! Am feeling so frustrated with work!! I really need to finish my meeting minutes but every other minute some other task pops into my brain and blows my concentration. In the end I'm like someone with 6 feet tripping all over myself trying to walk forward. Ugh!!

It helps that I bought that printer so that I can see things on paper if necessary. But it's not so easy to work at home with all the brats getting angry at each other and my room all smelly and in a mess thanks to having another foster at home... It doesn't take too long to dress up Toby's wound, but I end up spending hours giving him and all the other brats TLC. Sigh.

Then there's the house chores (other than ones done by cleaners), and extra cleaning, again, due to too many cats. Someone has been puking all over the place too, so even MORE cleaning. Heck, I'm not wasting time watching TV or Kimchi anymore, I've got KITS to worry about! Now that Toby is with me, Nemo and Comot have not been seen for more than a week, I wonder where they are.

There's no proper place to work at home, actually. The hall is too open and distracting and the room is just too crowded with no real working zone. Now there's no space left with the cats' cages and kitty litter there.

I have too much work overdue and if this continues I can't blame anyone for kicking me out. Heck, I would kick ME out if I was the boss!

Pah found a nice apartment going at a reasonable price, so hope it proves to be good so that we can go ahead and buy. There will be so much work after that too, with the EPF withdrawal, loan (maybe), renovations (minor, I hope), furniture, decorating, etc, etc, etc. But if it means having a place of our own, with a study where we can park all our books and magazines, and someplace I can actually DO WORK, it will be well worth the effort.

Hope things come together this year. Last year was nothing but a frustrating old bunch of bad moves. I really hope things get better this year, Amin....

Frustrations...

It's already the new year and honestly, I don't feel very hopeful. I'm struggling to finish my work in between a gazillion distractions, both unintended and self-inflicted.

Hunting for a new home has proven to be quite a challenge, especially because I'm dealing with my dear brother, who can be terribly vague with details like how much is he willing to chip in and what price range we're looking at... I've looked at almost a dozen places and it's not so easy to find a place which has a nice layout, decent fittings and a reasonable price. I've tried doing this a couple years back and it stagnated because he didn't have the money from his apartment sale yet. Now the money has come in, he's being wishy washy about the choices. We need a family pow-wow, which can be a bit hard since K Ayu now works odd hours and on weekends. Thank God I've been logging the places I looked at so we can look at the details easier.

It doesn't help that my favourite option is a walk up apartment on the 3rd floor. I love the layout, I can visualise where things will be and what we'll need. the place is large, airy and sunny. I even talked to the locals and liked them...But the development has been neglected over the years and the residents have only just taken over the management, so there is much improvement that needs to be done. I suppose if my job is stable, I can easily apply for a housing loan. I wouldn't mind paying for it myself since I'm the one who likes it so much.

As it is, I'm really behind with work and I've not been very motivated lately. Trying to get work done in between house hunting and caring for delinquent cats is not easy. I also tend to give up and go home early instead of staying back like I used to do... Sigh.

Right now am caring for a beautiful silver tabby, which looks like an American shorthair. He's gorgeous, but he has been feral at the apartment for I don't know how long, and recently he developed an abscess on the head. The things has burst and a patch of skin has come off, leaving a big ugly hole of raw tissue exposed. The idiot keeps pulling off the bandages I put on it, so now I'm applying iodine at intervals to keep it from getting infected. I'm quite confident it will heal in no time, cats are resilient that way.

I had brought him to Abang's house last Saturday but managed to lose him. Duh!. Thankfully, cats know they have an ally in soft-hearted Mrs Lim and he stayed at her place the past few days. She's squeamish about wounds though, so I took him home to treat yesterday, which opens up another can of worms, of course.

My brats are understandably displeased with the presence of another fostered feline. And I have to either put up with transporting him to the loo, or having a litter tray in the room. This is the part I hate about bringing in fosters. And there is a risk of them latching on to me like Pikachu did, making him impossible to rehome. Should've known better, mackerel tabbies are terribly clingy and possessive of their humans...

Hope I manage to hold on to my job, and actually GROW instead of stagnating. 2012 was lacklustre, I really hope I can do better this year. amin.