Tuesday, August 18, 2009


I'm exhausted. A bunch of information I was promised never came in the mailbox. I spent the day chasing after people trying to organise things. Boss is super angry with me because for whatever stupid reason, everything is super overdue. I just can't manage to get my work done. It's like my brain as well as my sense of urgency had left town. Plus reliance on external factors. So here I am, well after office hours, still struggling to put my stories together.

At least car finally came, so I have transport again. Especially now the rainy season has begun, motorbikes are not a good option for moving around. Last week had to deal with motor rosak as well as kena saman for roadtax mati. Otherwise I'd be at sister's mercy since we shared her car. Add to the fact that I detest the suspension on Kelisa. It sucks.

So unhappy with the thought that if I don't make time to do things around the house, they just don't get done. Period. Sis is super-picky about doing things. It seems she's afraid to get her hands dirty, so guess who has to play Indon maid... I'm over-stressed about work, and I don't get any pampering at home. :( So tired right now... I need some TLC.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

The Psychology of Fasting

Ramadhan is fast approaching again, and for those of us who were too lazy to puasa ganti awal-awal, now's the time to "pay up" before the next round starts.

Have forced myself to start fasting today, after a few false starts. Still have 8 days to go and Ramadhan starts next Saturday (22nd). Now, halfway through the day I'm starting to feel antsy. It's not as if I'm suffering... it's just that we're used to eating every so often that we crave the activity. I'm not even hungry! I had a late meal which qualifies as sahur. Don't expect me to wake up at 4.30 when I sleep at one la.. Don't ask why i sleep so late. My body clock is certifiably cuckoo.

Sigh.. why la we always wait until the very last moment to ganti puasa? It's not that difficult. It even gives you extra time to work because you won't have to worry about going out for lunch. We're just creatures of habit, aren't we? I think fasting is so much more a mental exercise than a physical one. Yes, we do get a bit tired after half a day without food, but it won't kill you.

Anyway, if it gets TOO bad and you fear for your life, then you'd have valid reason to break your fast and try again another day. But from experience (when I was a kid), it's mostly because we cannot tahan the mental strain of NOT doing something we're so used to doing. Heh. Even at this age it's kind of hard to fast outside of Ramadhan because we can always do it another day. :-p

Oh well, at the end of THIS day, at least, will be a sumptous feast awaiting me and my colleagues, so that will be my reward for being a good girl for another 6.5 hours. La la la...

Wednesday, August 05, 2009

To Rally or Not to Rally. That is the question.

Personally, I hate crowds, so don't count on me to attend rallies and stuff like that. Saw what happened on Saturday on TV and wondered where I stood on the issue. Seriously, I haven't been paying attention, so I don't understand why there are 2 groups for and against ISA planning to rally. The "for" group nak apa? ISA kan dah ada?

Anyway, being the perverse being I am whenever it comes to my sis, the moment she said the rally organisers are stupid, I immediately defended them. Ye la. We're supposed to be a democratic country. How come we're not allowed to have any kind of protests? Takkan la semua protest dikira threat to community? Kalau kita asyik accept aje benda yang salah pun kita diamkan aje, passive, banyak le benda yang jadi bernanah dalam our society. Kalau nak kira permit, any permit applied by opposition semua ditolak. So nak buat apa harapkan permit yang dah for sure tak dapat? Belasah ajelah!

Next issue, ISA itself. Is it really necessary? What happens without it? What are the repercussions? I think these are the issues that need to be figured out logically, not by political parties for and against it to protect their own interests. Rakyat punya interest nak letak mana, bang?

Moving on, the rally itself. Was it really unpeaceful? Were there property damaged before the FRU came along and threw tear gas and water cannons? I heard people were chanting 'Allahu Akbar". Why? Apa kait mengaitnya dengan ISA? Tolong terangkan sikit. Yang pasti, chanting loudly can create fear among bystanders and overexcitement among ralliers. It's a natural phenomenon, like mass hysteria. Kalau sorang start destroying property, yang lain sure ikut punya. That would be so unnecessary. Personally, kalau orang kata peaceful rally, I'd visualise a quiet sit in, maybe a candlelight vigil. No chanting. That would be peaceful. Kalau dok terjerit2, mana peacefulness nya? Nak hantar surat kat Agong, pegi la hantar. Was it necessary to berarak ramai2?

So... salah ke orang yang organise rally tu? Salah ke orang yang turut serta? Salah siapa semua orang bertempiaran lari, orang awam yang takde kena mengena pun terlibat sama? Kenapa permohonan permit ditolak? Why can't people in power accept that sometimes there are differing opinions which should be considered, maybe accepted. There must be a reason people membantah. Perhaps we need to follow better guidelines, we don't need to tear the whole system down. Starting from scratch is not easy. There must have been some valid reason ISA was created. What are the risks we face without it?

What we need is accountable people on all sides, not idiots who jump to conclusions and force their will upon others even though they know that it is wrong. The problem of our country is that too many people are trampling over each other to get higher up. Cina kata Melayu malas, Melayu kata Cina penipu, India kaki kelentong, pengabisnya, siapa yang untung? Semua rugi!

Buat sekolah kebangsaan, kata terlampau Islamik, terlampau Melayu. Orang lain rasa tersisih. Dekat sekolah Cina, dia ajar budak2 Melayu bodoh. Sekolah Tamil I tak tau. How are we supposed to be unified? Kenapa tak boleh dalam satu sekolah bahasa Mandarin & Tamil dibuat matapelajaran elektif? kenapa mesti ada sekolah lain?

Jawapannya - because we don't trust each other. Do we? Be honest with yourself. We are all racist. So? How are we going to fix this problem?

Accepting the problem is a problem may be a good place to start.

Sunday, August 02, 2009

One Hot Dude

Went to watch The Proposal again last night. Seriously, i'm hooked. It has entered the list of my favourite rom-coms together with The Holiday, Runaway Bride and Kate & Leopold. Some may not agree with my choices. Whatever la. I loooove rom-coms. It's balm for my empty soul. Somehow it gives me hope that someday, my Gilbert Blythe or Drew Paxton will magically appear :D

Didn't think much of Ryan Reynolds in Definitely, Maybe; but I do like his character in this one. Maybe it's just me, but it was a HUGE turn on when he turned the tables on Margaret. And the guy he turned into - hmm... nice combo. A little manja, a bit rough, sweet, caring, strong.. OK OK, I know it was just a character, but you know... I wish a guy like that would like me. Ha. Maybe I'm just a sucker for bossy guys. [Flashback: "Chilis. NOW"]. Big turn on :D

Nuff said. Back to work, woman..