Right now I feel like a mother who had abandoned her handicapped child :( I keep worrying about Nemo, whether she was going back to Mak Lang's house to eat or roaming around, scared and hungry...
But I haven't been able to go find her, being stuck in the office night after night because for some reason, I only sleep at 3 or 4 a.m. and then go around in a fog until noon when the old tinker finally kicks in. So I start on my mountain of mess late and end up late too. It doesn't help that there are so many things going on at about the same time and I'm scrambling to finish them all on a lame ass brain....
I managed to patch something together for RCP by Monday night but the PR for Raj has been delayed for too long. Just managed to throw him the Media Advisory today after holing up in the cave after lunch. Still owe him the Press Release which he has been asking for for ages. I HATE being this stupid person who can't get her work done on time. I wish there was some magic elixir which would help me wake up and deliver gorgeous work on time, every time.
A junior who just started work last year managed to get a new job which pays as much as my salary just one year later. It took me 17 years to get this far. How depressing is that?? All this while, I've just crawled along year after year scared to death of losing my current job because for some reason, I can't seem to be any good at anything at all. It's bloody depressing to be the stupid one who can't do well after years and years of trying.
I'm not even sure there would be any good to gain from going back to find Nemo because she could be miles away by now. But then, she did stay close when she roamed last year, so hopefully she would still be nearby and I can set things right...
It's doesn't feel right that she has to suffer because we, the dominant ones, could not tolerate her presence in our territory any longer... I DO love that silly old dodo, for what it's worth and I really don't want her to suffer. She probably suffers emotionally too, because probably the only person to actually care for and coddle her had abandoned her in lands unknown. Such betrayal would hurt for sure, right??
Maybe I feel too much on behalf of my animals, maybe I would have been better off as a vet... God knows.. I hope HE takes care of her, because right now, I can't.
But I haven't been able to go find her, being stuck in the office night after night because for some reason, I only sleep at 3 or 4 a.m. and then go around in a fog until noon when the old tinker finally kicks in. So I start on my mountain of mess late and end up late too. It doesn't help that there are so many things going on at about the same time and I'm scrambling to finish them all on a lame ass brain....
I managed to patch something together for RCP by Monday night but the PR for Raj has been delayed for too long. Just managed to throw him the Media Advisory today after holing up in the cave after lunch. Still owe him the Press Release which he has been asking for for ages. I HATE being this stupid person who can't get her work done on time. I wish there was some magic elixir which would help me wake up and deliver gorgeous work on time, every time.
A junior who just started work last year managed to get a new job which pays as much as my salary just one year later. It took me 17 years to get this far. How depressing is that?? All this while, I've just crawled along year after year scared to death of losing my current job because for some reason, I can't seem to be any good at anything at all. It's bloody depressing to be the stupid one who can't do well after years and years of trying.
I'm not even sure there would be any good to gain from going back to find Nemo because she could be miles away by now. But then, she did stay close when she roamed last year, so hopefully she would still be nearby and I can set things right...
It's doesn't feel right that she has to suffer because we, the dominant ones, could not tolerate her presence in our territory any longer... I DO love that silly old dodo, for what it's worth and I really don't want her to suffer. She probably suffers emotionally too, because probably the only person to actually care for and coddle her had abandoned her in lands unknown. Such betrayal would hurt for sure, right??
Maybe I feel too much on behalf of my animals, maybe I would have been better off as a vet... God knows.. I hope HE takes care of her, because right now, I can't.
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