Betrayals

Remember those silly squabbles we had when we were children? Those that culminated in "Taknak kawan dengan awak."? Days later, we'd be playing together again, all disagreements forgotten. Funny to think such nonsense could still occur when you were full grown adults. Maybe adult betrayals of trust was harder to forgive. Maybe you still wanted a real apology. Maybe you were being childish... Kind of weird to see someone online and not being able to start the usual nonsensical banter which was once the norm.

I find that as much as I enjoy being with certain friends, sometimes it lacks the sense of familiarity, the knowing that he would understand where you came from, what you had gone through. After all, no one tells all to others. We are selective in the information that we disclose. Despite the fun impromptu shabu-shabu dinner and midnight birthday bash with a variety of cakes and culminating roti tisu supper, there is a feeling of the superficial, that all was just temporary. Soon, he would return to his world, and again, I would be left to fend on my own. Not many understand the need to belong, because they are often already there. It's a heavy price you pay for ineptitude. Sometimes you wish it isn't so.