Sometimes I feel like taking my tudung off. Why? Because somewhere deep down inside, I'm that wild child who yearns to frolic by the river, sleep under the stars and do whatever she likes in the depths of the loving arms of the rainforest where she resides. Temporarily, of course. The other half of me has become old-woman, urbanite who enjoys her cafe latte and dinners at Tony Roma's. Heh. Sad.
Somehow I feel more alive dressed in fitting tees, shirts and jeans/khakis. I like my baju kurungs and stuff, but rugged togs - I LOVE them. I love wearing grungy old clothes and just hang around some river doing nothing. Maybe read, or nap, at the most. Ah... but Uncle Razali's place in Rantau Abang has been sold off, and it's just too lonely to go lepak in Fraser's by myself. Especially since I lost my bins. What would I do there?? Haven't bought my DSLR yet, have I? .
Maybe I'm having a mid-life crisis. Maybe this loneliness is getting to me. I miss my old man, maybe my buddies are getting to be a little high-end, maybe I just need a change... Or some time alone to recharge instead of worrying about work all the time. A partner in crime would be even better, but Uncle Bean has gone home and so far has not replied my email for the past week. It was fun hanging out w Uncle Bean in RA and Merapoh last time, despite the speeding ticket and (I suspect) scandal that rocked the Taman Negara. Relax la, we shared a room, nothing more!! Tak baik tau, tuduh2..
It's a bit stupid right now, wanting to go for a CAT trip, but knowing a particular person would prefer not to see my ugly old face instead of the sweet young things. I actually miss my picnic rock and swimming hole. On the other hand, it's the rainy season, and it might well flood the whole area, so any trekking would probably be torture. Give this old woman a break lah! Hmm... Still thinking of a place where I can go and relax for a couple of days...
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