No Sense or Lack of Attention?

Reading about the father who raped his own daughter and fathered her child, I felt so sad...

There has been too many cases of (mostly illegitimate) children being born and murdered to cover up the mistake. Too many girls give in to their boyfriends' wishes to 'prove their love'; and in the end, they are the ones to pay for their actions. Imagine young girls suffering in silence for 9 months to cover their pregnancy, giving birth on their own without any medical attention and sometimes driven to kill their own child out of despair.

There were teens who followed 'new friends' out late at night and got raped; what were they doing out at that hour? Where were the parents? Did they not have responsibilities or chores to do at home? Shouldn't they be in bed, or at least home by midnight?

In this particular case, the girl admitted to allowing the man to rape/have sex with her. Why?? A much older man, which in this case turned out to be her own biological father, and she actually ALLOWED him to do it. Are you so starved for attention/love that you would allow someone you hardly know to take you home and take advantage of you? She was only 14 at the time. Old enough for sexual experimentation, I suppose, but in a normal world, it would be someone around her age, a boyfriend. Why follow an unknown man and do stuff with him? It boggles the mind.

A possible explanation is desperation for love and attention. Her mother is divorced, probably struggling to make ends meet without getting any support from the ex-husband. Probably there was no time or effort to guide her child about normal relationships and sex. I wonder if there was any emphasis on religion. So the girl goes around, guided (or misguided) by what she learns from her friends and the media. Sex is love, love love love... and she does whatever feels good... She gets the attention she craves, and she is happy, for a time. Until hell breaks loose and she finds herself pregnant. Did she tell her mum? Did she get any help? It was said that she and the child received assistance at 2 shelter homes. She is at least trying to finish her schooling. Thank goodness for that.

What worries me is that many children these days do not see the consequences of their actions. The media promotes FUN FUN FUN. Responsible kids are BORING and NERDS. Many don't have a vision for the future or know what they should be doing to prepare for adulthood; and a common missing ingredient is parental guidance. Parents work long hours to make ends meet, or earn more money to afford STUFF. Stuff which are not always necessary. It could be an opportunity to become more responsible when parents are absent, but it is also an opportunity to misbehave. Lord knows we always did what we liked up until the time our parents were scheduled to come home!!

And sometimes parents behave badly too. I know people who poisons their kids' minds about their dad since they divorced. I saw a nice boy change into someone quite unpleasant when his dad started to fool with another woman. He became an angry young man, torn between loving his now inconsiderate dad and protecting his mom. He started smoking and skipping school to earn money. He openly writes about his anger and relationships on Facebook. It is a sad thing to see...

I know I often get frustrated when I think about the lack of guidance I had from my own parents. I believe we could have become better people but missed that chance. But at least they were decent role models, if not perfect, so at least we didn't end up doing stupid things with unknown men.

I feel sorry for these children, growing up with no guidance, with equally misguided parents.. what would happen to them in the future?