Clarity

It's strange... now that I've recovered from last week's illness, I feel so much better than before. Perhaps it's true that sometimes you have an underlying condition that lays dormant so you seem OK, but actually your insides are pretty messed up. My sinuses could have clogged up my brains or something. I had been feeling off for quite some time, and the run in with the fish bone just made it worse. Muscles were really tight and I had digestion problems.The massage I had must have loosened the knot, and later the yoga pose allowed the blood to break through and suffuse my brain... Being ill wasn't much fun, I was miserable for more than a week! Even now I still have a bit of residual mucous and my sinuses isn't properly balanced, it hurts if I bend over, feels like blood rushing to my upper right quarter of the brain. Ouch!!

Bought a neti pot from Serina last night, but haven't used it yet. I should, though. My sinus is a little sore on the right side and I'm doing some facial massage to relieve the pressure. You know it works when bits of snot slide down into yr throat. Not an entirely pleasant sensation, but necessary all the same. Hope it will get better soon. I have SO much work to do....

Alhamdulillah, now I feel so much better, I can even hear myself think... Before, my head was one giant clogged up mess, seriously. I felt so confused and guilty and scared and everything... Not very comforting for someone who has no one to turn to. Have finally come to terms with letting the young one go. Strangely I feel like someone else is on the way, and if I concentrate on dealing with my own issues, things will fall into place. I DO hope so :-)

Right now, am trying to help K Ayu stem her financial problem. She can't simply let things run out of control! But I do  understand how you sometimes feel so helpless that you just let go... She needs the support, and I'll try to help her the best I can. She also needs a big smack upside the head. Seriously. Oh well, we grew up without any support, and we're all pretty much screwed, so all we can do now is to do what we can to help each other, right?

I hope I don't get sick anymore. Have been sick on and off so much these past few months, I couldn't get much done. Hope I can catch up and do well this year. It would be nice to be reliable and appreciated for a change. Hwaiting!!

P/S - Have decided to concentrate on paying off my credit card first and worry about my grand holiday plans later. Will keep car since it's no use selling it off at a ridiculously low price. MAY fork out money to change the paint colour. May just keep the money I saved since it feels so good not to be completely impoverished... Insya-Allah will do more things once I achieve financial independence :-) Amin....