Happy New Year!

Or Selamat Menyambut Maal Hijrah... I spent mine asleep in a dorm in Merapoh, tired after the long journey from KL, working life in general, and the quick survey drive we had that afternoon. Spent the long weekend on a CAT trip, even though I only went for one walk that Sunday morning. We found a freshly abandoned camp, some illegal timber and not much else. The animal tracks that used to be in abundance have all disappeared.

That evening, everyone else went to Bumbun Rimau. After that miserable night with Graham in May, I opted out and took a nice, comfy room instead. Made dinner with my trusty burner and mess tin, then had a short chat with Jim, who was there with Keong and Jeff, canoeing, then pottered with paints and went to bed. That was SO restful!

Woke up in the morning to a beautiful view, then joined the boys for breakfast outside. Sent them off on their canoe and kayaks, napped and simply enjoyed the peace and quiet. Left for KL after lunch. Pretty uneventful, a little jammed, but it was OK. Have come to a truce with the young one... He's nice to me as long as I don't ask for more than he's willing to give.. Fair enough I suppose. Too lazy to go find a new man, think I'll focus on work and let the guys find me instead. Why not, right?

It's a new year, and I pray that it will be a good one. Amin!!

My Mummy's Boys

I have always had the tendency to fall for mummy's boys.... Or maybe ALL boys are mummy's boys :D Not all of them are bad, some of them do manage to think for themselves when it matters. After all, not everyone is as bullheaded as I am, right?

Right now am super addicted to the Ojakgyo brothers, no thanks to K Ayu's introduction to Korean dramas! Managed to stay clear of Winter Sonata, sangkut yang ini pulak.. hehehe.. The reason - maybe because it's so realistic kot... Everyone has their good and bad sides, except maybe for Cha Soo Young's mom who is so damned bongkak and pretentious. Not to mention the super cute boys... The eldest tak berapa best pasal his character terlampau lurus, and the youngest is too opportunistic (right now la). Their characters change over time, and since watching from the beginning baru I paham Ja Eun's character and what she went through. The mom pun ada dark side jugak, and the dad is well-meaning guy who sometimes kena tipu, so a little bit of a loser at times. Kesian tengok Mi Sook yang suka kat Tae Sik tapi rebuffed; although now we know why she's so 'odd' la...

I love the interaction between the characters. It's kelakar when the makcik2 semua bergasak, menyampah when the bitchy girls cat-fight, and I LLOOOOVVVEE watching the boys bergasak among themselves due to whatever issue they had at the time :D Dalam ramai2 tu I think Tae Bum's the sexiest, no doubt he's some superstar out in Korea (obviously I don't know anything about local superstars, apa lagi yang kat Korea).

But overall, the whole drama encompasses family, love, relationships, marriage, conflict, semua ada. It's amazing how similar their values are to our own, and amazing that families actually arrange 'blind dates' instead of simply (and annoyingly) asking "takde calon ker?". Actually, if we look at it, the whole of Asia have remarkably similar values of close family ties and 'responsible' relationships. It makes me proud to be Asian :-)

While the Western open mindedness have been much admired and emulated, there is a distinct tinge of selfishness when it comes to relationships. It says, this is MY life, and no one has a right to force me to do anything differently. Having one's own mind is fine, but it's not so nice when we shut out family and push others away because of our 'individuality'. I don't know. We come from different mindsets, I guess...

Whatever it is, am glad yesterday's interview went smoothly and I can focus on building my career and putting my life back on track. That trip to Taman Negara this weekend would be a nice change after spending so many weekends at home. I do miss the clean forest air and  scent of damp earth :-)

The Real Me

Sometimes I feel like taking my tudung off. Why? Because somewhere deep down inside, I'm that wild child who yearns to frolic by the river, sleep under the stars and do whatever she likes in the depths of the loving arms of the rainforest where she resides. Temporarily, of course. The other half of me has become old-woman, urbanite who enjoys her cafe latte and dinners at Tony Roma's. Heh. Sad.

Somehow I feel more alive dressed in fitting tees, shirts and jeans/khakis. I like my baju kurungs and stuff, but rugged togs - I LOVE them. I love wearing grungy old clothes and just hang around some river doing nothing. Maybe read, or nap, at the most. Ah... but Uncle Razali's place in Rantau Abang has been sold off, and it's just too lonely to go lepak in Fraser's by myself. Especially since I lost my bins. What would I do there?? Haven't bought my DSLR yet, have I? .

Maybe I'm having a mid-life crisis. Maybe this loneliness is getting to me. I miss my old man, maybe my buddies are getting to be a little high-end, maybe I just need a change... Or some time alone to recharge instead of worrying about work all the time. A partner in crime would be even better, but Uncle Bean has gone home and so far has not replied my email for the past week. It was fun hanging out w Uncle Bean in RA and Merapoh last time, despite the speeding ticket and (I suspect) scandal that rocked the Taman Negara. Relax la, we shared a room, nothing more!! Tak baik tau, tuduh2..

It's a bit stupid right now, wanting to go for a CAT trip, but knowing a particular person would prefer not to see my ugly old face instead of the sweet young things. I actually miss my picnic rock and swimming hole. On the other hand, it's the rainy season, and it might well flood the whole area, so any trekking would probably be torture. Give this old woman a break lah! Hmm... Still thinking of a place where I can go and relax for a couple of days...